Survivor's Guilt (Original Date: August 2014)

Can you see me?

Can you feel me?

All the time I've wasted

Just for a chance to

Feel alive inside

Bracing for impact

Inside liquified

Come inside

It's easy to hide

Scars decorate the body

Another sign of grief

The decay of the mind

The first to go this time

You don't see the fight

You don't have the right

To tell me it's over

To tell me to stop

Grieving for the lost

Grieving for the self

Lost within thoughts

Another convoluted will

Attempts galore

Never for glamour

Take what you will from me

I've gone through the black

I've been there and gone back

What do you want me to say?

It get's easier over time?

It's not in me to lie like that

Each day is a new struggle

Each thought a tug on a string

Already strung to snapping

The veins feel icy

The heart erratic

What is this feeling

At the edge of the cliff

But refusing to be pushed

Refusing to jump

Waiting for the land slide

Waiting for the scythed hand

I've been here before

Doesn't make it easier

Doesn't make this easy

Tearjerker in detail

Unable to see the light

Unable to flee the dark

All one can do

Is become one with the dark

Learn to be one

Learn to feel the truth out

Was there ever any doubt

The greatest pain is to survive